Stuff Like That

Hi again!

I think I will try to blog real quick tonight before heading to bed. 

Umm…

Today I got a call from the C.A.S worker, actually a voice message, but anyways she was saying that her and her supervisor were leaning more towards putting my eldest daughter in the care of my partner and myself. That’s excellent news!! 

However, she needs a criminal record check of my partner. He did go to the police station to get it done this evening, but I guess they close at 4pm. So yeah, he’ll have to try again another time. The sooner we can get that to C.A.S, the better. I believe him when he says his record is pretty clean. Nothing since he was a teen. So yeah, just need that for court, and I think we’ll be good to go. 

C.A.S does want to visit again, even though they came by not too long ago. But she’s thinking of scheduling a Friday…Which reminds me, in a couple of weeks, our weekend visits could be getting extended from Friday evening to Sunday evening. So this next C.A.S visit that is to be scheduled is so she can see my eldest daughter in our home, how she behaves, what we do, stuff like that. 

But yeah, when it comes to finally bringing my eldest daughter home for good, things are looking pretty bright. 

Things are still up in the air when it comes to my son. The C.A.S worker is concerned about him since he doesn’t want to visit neither myself or his father. 

So I asked her if he had his tablet that his father gave him for Christmas. She confirmed that. So I told her about the issues we (our sons father and I) had when it comes to video games. He’s like an addict when it comes to video games. If he can’t play his video games, he’ll get depressed and just want to sleep all day. 

I also told her that technology had been an issue after he witnessed his father assault me. It used to be movies, he’d watch Garfield over and over. Then he was introduced to videogames by his father. It’s like that’s how he shuts out the world. The trauma. He’s never really dealt with that traumatic experience, and he needs to in order to be able to move forward. So yeah, she wrote down some notes like all workers do, and said she’d forward that information to Vanier. I hope it helps. 

The reason he probably stopped visiting is because he witnessed my partner and I bicker about alcohol. He came home after celebrating his best friends birthday, and yeah, he was a bit tipsy. I got angry because I thought he came home hammered and my children were  over. It was all a misunderstanding. My man is a lightweight, and can’t handle drinking as much as he used to (before our relationship).

 Anyways, my son probably thinks my partner will hurt me like his father did, and no. I’ve said it many times, my partner refuses to even raise his voice with me. His patience and understanding has been amazing. I’m lucky to have him by my side through all this. 

By the way, a week or two ago my man had 2 beers after work. It gave him a headache, and he’s been avoiding alcohol since. So needless to say, I don’t think I have to worry about alcoholism. If he does drink, there’s a huge gap in between. That’s no alcoholic. I am so grateful he proved my fears wrong. 

Like I said before, regarding my son at Vanier, for all we know, my eldest son could be at Vanier for a year. Hopefully by the time he gets out, he’s more happy, confident, and not as scared of the world.

Yes, the world can be scary and violent. Heck, just watch the news.It’s made to induce fear. It’s all negative. But the world can be beautiful too. It just depends on your perspective and where you look. 

Other than that, I have contacted the nearby resource centre, and library, to inquire about mom and baby programs within the neighborhood. I think it’s time that my baby gets socialized, and quite honestly as amazing as this sounds for an introvert, I too need to be around people. Plus, I get bored, and I think my baby does too. So yeah, time to find fun things we could do together within the community. So far, I am thinking of attending 2 programs at the library. They start around the 21st. One is called Books for Babies, and the other is Story Time. So not only will we get out and mingle with others, my baby gets to learn more literacy. 
Other than that, the stress of owing debts is weighing us down a bit. With that being said, I am considering this online Younique presenter job more and more. I would be able to work from home, and my own hours. The only risk is that it’s paid by commission. So… if I take it on, I would have to hustle my ass. The starter kit costs $144 approximately. So not only will I have to make my money back, I would have to be damn good to be able to make more than I can get from OW. $300 per month…but plus what they cover for utilities…I’d have to make at least $700 -1000/ month. 

I guess I just need to believe I can do it. Even though my last sales job at Anvision , which was also paid commission, I didn’t do so shit hot. But than again, that was years ago. 

For all I know I could be good at it. I mean, people on Twitter think I’m an entrepreneur, or a social media marketer. I don’t even know what those entail. So if I’m doing something that seems along those lines, well la dee da! I’m a natural! I don’t even realize that that’s what I’m doing. Lol

Anyways, it’s getting late, and I should rest. I’m sure my baby has another busy day planned for me. Haha! 

Thanks for reading! Peace and love – Pooks 

“The realization that limitations are imaginary will make you strong and overpowering” 

– Stephen Richards

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