One Thing at a Time

Hi again. 

It’s almost been a month since we left. It’s amazing how time flies. 

I’ve contacted legal aid, and talked to 2 lawyers regarding my charge. I cannot get another certificate for a lawyer until after my court appearance on August 17th and I’ve spoken with the duty council. However, every person that I talk to doesn’t think it will come down to jail time. I keep being told not to worry. Even the CAS worker that was involved for my youngest daughter says that I was just being protective of my children. Hence, she’s closing my youngest daughters file. So yeah, I  can’t really do anything for that but wait. 

I finally got the final piece in that was needed for housing. So hopefully it won’t be to much longer until we get a home. 

I’ve been told by the officers that I can go back to my ex partners address once, just to pick up things, however I will be escorted by the police. That’s fine by me, as long as my ex-partner isn’t present flapping his mouth. I don’t need his rude remarks distracting me while I try to think of (and gather) important belongings for myself and the girls. 

Honestly, I’d rather go while he’s at work to avoid any conflict period. 

Anyways, when I  do decide to do this, I  have to call the police in the morning to arrange it, and they will set it up and get it done later on the same day. 

Also, I  need to find my T5 and what not so that I can do my taxes. Since I’ve been with my ex-partner, he avoided doing his taxes for 2 years . So it’s like; no wonder we’re not getting any financial benefits. 

Anyways, the CRA advised me to get my taxes done at Life Spin. However…I need those documents to do so. I have to go back…

I’m hoping that I can bring someone other than the police to accompany me. Not only for safety reasons, but just so we can pack as much as we can as quickly as we can. Another set of arms would help. 

I’m not looking forward to it, but I know it needs to be done.  Plus my eldest daughter wrote me a list of her belongings that she wants back. 

Not only that, but there’s a painting I did of my youngest daughter, and yeah, that does not belong to my ex partner.  Nor does any of the other paintings I’ve done. 

If I do get the painting of my youngest daughter back, I  might give it to the shelter. The staff here has been so amazing, and my youngest daughter brightens up thier day. So maybe I can give them that painting as a thank you, and they’ll have something to remember us by after we go. Whenever that will be. 

What else? I  had my first ultrasound done for my current pregnancy.  The doctor said I could be having a boy. They’ll have a better idea when the baby gets bigger, possibly at 20 weeks. They also said it could be a New Years baby. 

I still have to get blood work done…then I can book my next prenatal appointment.  It may be tough with 3 children, but I’m going to try. 

A settlement conference is coming up on the 20th. That is when I for sure get custody of my daughter. Hopefully my current living circumstances does not effect that. My son will likely be placed in foster care, but as my lawyer said, it’s not the end. We still have a chance. I just need to get things settled within 6 months, and we shall see. Even though according to my eldest daughter, she reported that my eldest son wants nothing to do with his parents. I don’t blame him. I  messed up. I let a drunk move into our safe haven that was free from alcohol and drugs. He no longer felt safe in my home and I am sorry. I hope one day he can forgive me. 

That relationship was rushed. I should have known it would explode in my face. Most nose dives do. Or you don’t realize how shitty it really is until it’s too late. What snapped me out of the illusion was the impact on my eldest daughter. She was a happy child ready to take on the world, and she was becoming scared and insecure, afraid to so much as make a mistake.A child shouldn’t feel afraid to make mistakes. We all make mistakes, that is how we learn. To make a child fear that, they fear to learn anything new. That already happened to my son with his father, I  wasn’t about to let a step dad do that to another child of mine. 

My eldest daughter thanked me and said she loves me for that. I put my children first. Above men, above myself. Which is the way it should be for all parents.

Anyways, I’m writing a novel. Tomorrow the week begins…CAS visits us on Wednesday.  

One thing at a time…everything will be just fine…

Thanks for reading. Peace and love- Pooks